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First letter to my son

eeeeeek! That sounds so crazy to me. My SON?!

Our life has been so filled with pink and ruffles and baby dolls and little girls these last four years, it just amazes me that God has blessed us with a son. A boy. Trucks and bugs and baseball and blue. I still have to pinch myself because I cant believe it.

To my soon-to-be son,

I cant believe that in just a few short days I will have you in my arms, it blows me away. Every time I see you on an ultrasound (which is once a week!) I have them double check that your still a boy because I still am in shock. Your sisters have completely won us over with their love for dress up clothes, baby dolls, pink and all things sparkly and frilly, and to think that our family will soon have a precious little boy is hard to comprehend. I wonder every single day who you will look like, who you will act like, what your demeanor will be, what you will think of your silly sisters, and what they will think of you. Your daddy is so funny, he has had this sudden urge to be more ‘manly’ before you arrive, he told me he wants to start watching football and hes even growing a beard (mommy is NOT a fan!). He wants to be sure he is ready to be a good father to his first son, he is so in love with you already.

I am more pregnant right now than I ever was with your sisters, and while the days are long and this pregnancy hasn’t been easy I am thankful for every day that you stay in to bake a little longer. The ultrasound I had two weeks ago estimated you at almost 9 pounds so we think you will be a pretty big baby, and if you could see the size of my stomach right now you would believe that for sure. I have outgrown every maternity shirt I own except for two, so I am thankful to be on bedrest and not need to get dressed or go out in public anywhere! Your nursery is all ready, its decorated in navy blue and grey with a nautical/whale theme and it came together really cute! I am so excited just to have you home, our hearts couldn’t be more ready to love and snuggle you.

I am so excited to see what the following weeks and months hold baby boy, I just know you are the perfect fit for our family and I cant wait to see what its like to become a family of five. FIVE! Daddy likes to say “the Fazio five” so I suppose that’s what we will be known as from now on. I feel like our lives are just about complete, all we are waiting for is YOU.

I love you to the moon and back,

Momma

Patiently Waiting

…or is it impatiently?

I am just days away from delivering our third baby and to say I am a little stir crazy is an understatement! With both my previous pregnancies, I delivered on a day I was actually at work. Thankfully I work at a hospital and just wasn’t feeling right, made my way down to L&D and low and behold they were both born later that day. This times been a little different and I cant complain. At 28 weeks my blood pressures started creeping up so my cautious and amazing OB put me on Labetalol and asked me to monitor it closely at home and at work. At 32 weeks he ordered for me to be on light duty and to start having twice weekly testing which means non-stress tests and biophysical profiles at a fetal monitoring center. Thankfully this little guy has been a rockstar and has checked out perfectly every time, but at 36 weeks when I started having bad headaches and my blood pressures were rising despite increasing my dose we decided bed rest at home would be the best option. ME?! On BED REST? You have got to be kidding me. But I am so busy, I have so much to do, don’t you know we recently moved into a new house, and I have a nursery to put together and 378 things on my to-do list and I have a 2 and 4 year old?

Yep, me.

And its actually been heavenly. Yes, its had its challenges, especially with it being my husbands busiest time of the year with his business, but thanks to him and a lot of help from our amazing family and friends we are making it work and I am enjoying this downtime before life gets a little crazy. Naps every day, crocheting hats for this sweet baby boy, watching mindless TV, having dinner made every night (crock pot of course!), and time with my family. As much as I love being ‘on top’ of things and having it a little more together, I know God is using this time to prepare me mentally for the changes that are coming for us and to remind me that He is in control, not me. May His will be done with this pregnancy and delivery and this precious little baby.

I know I have put blogging on the back burner for a long time, literally I think I have my 5 posts total from the entire year. I have really been focusing on some other things that I have committed to and to be honest it just felt like too much to add something else to my plate. This week I was putting together our yearly family book (for 2012, I know, slacker!) and I realized how very important incorporating my blog posts has been to those books. My kids love when I pull out their first year books and read things to them like letters I wrote them, things they were doing at certain ages, etc. It is only fair that I would do the same for this sweet baby and God has also been impressing a lot of things on my heart about writing more open and honestly about my faith. Not for anyone, simply to remember how He has worked, is working and will continue to work in my life. To glorify Him, to point my life to Him. It has also been incredibly healing to read back at a lot of the things I wrote when my dad was sick and after his passing and see just how far I have come, how faithful God has been to me, how incredible this journey of healing has been. I am so blessed.

So, I am back. I finally figured out how to blog from my iPhone too!

Back to School

Today was Miss O’s first day of Pre-K and we couldn’t be more excited for her. She is back at the school she did preschool at last year and was really excited to be back today and to see her friends and her teacher, Miss Anne. We have been so incredibly blessed by finding a small and close knit private Christian school for her and we are praying and hoping that God’s will would be to keep her there for all of her education. She was really excited about her new barbie backpack she picked out, her new tennis shoes not so much! We all had bagels for breakfast as a family, got ready for school and had time to snap a couple of pics.

Starting our second official ‘school year’ was a little bittersweet for this momma. While I am so incredibly blessed by a smart and healthy 4 year old little girl its a reminder that another year has come and gone, another summer break gone by, another shopping trip to remind me that she is constantly growing (and OUT growing everything!) and changing and it just puts a tiny ache in my heart. There is also a small component of mom-anxiety about her being around people other than me and her dad all day. I know she is in a healthy and loving and nurturing environment but its still not HOME, she isn’t under the security of my momma wings and unconditional love. Will she find someone to play with? What if no one helps her open her lunch? What if another child is mean to her? Ouch! I know, I cant shelter my babies forever and this is all part of the letting go process that will continue happening over the next 20+ years but the ‘first day’ back is just a reminder of these little aches and worries within my heart. I know that ultimately she is a child of God and like He promises over and over in His word, He is always with us, He will never leave us or forsake us! I know He is with her today, just like He is me and my aching heart of watching my babies grow older, and in that I find great comfort.

Do not fear, for I am with you. Isaiah 41:10 NASB

Gianna is TWO!

To my dear sweet baby girl who is no longer a baby,

It is hard to wrap my mind around the fact that you are not a baby anymore. The last two years have just gone by so fast its so hard to believe you are two now. I am putting off potty training you because it just makes you that much more of a big girl, wwaahhhh :(

At two you are:

-31 pounds, wearing a 3-4T and size 8 shoes, almost caught up to your big sister

-hilarious, you keep us laughing all day long with your funny faces and goofy songs and dancing

-not very lady like. You make huge messes when you eat, pull out rubber bands and bows when I do your hair, would rather just run around naked or in a diaper, etc.

-love to sing your ABC’s

-are a pretty good eater most of the time. As a baby you were a champ and are just about anything, now you are more picky but 75% of the time we can get you to eat most of what we give you. Your favorites right now are rice, fish sticks, spaghetti, strawberries, watermelon and CHEESE. You love cheese, you would eat it every meal if I let you.

-are an awesome sleeper and usually sleep from 7pm-8am and sometimes longer. Naps are iffy and you usually only nap if you do something in the morning that uses a lot of energy like gymnastics or swimming

-like the water but not quite as much as your sister. You aren’t as confident in the pool and want someone holding you all the time. Hopefully swim lessons this summer help that

-loooooove Jackson, our sweet 3 year old neighbor. If you see him playing outside you start screaming and going crazy until we let you see him. Its the sweetest thing!

-love babies, you love playing with baby dolls, love seeing babies in real life, you just adore everything baby. You are so sweet to my tummy and always say ‘hi baby!’ and ‘ni-nite baby’ before bed

-enjoying church, especially now that you have graduated to the bigger kid class. They say you are always so happy and smiling and never once have we been called out of service to get you

-LOVE water, you drink 5+ big cups a day, every time we give you a sippy with ice water you chug it until its gone, its so cute

-are really affectionate and cuddly, you love sitting on peoples laps and reading them books (more than you like letting them read you books) and you don’t seem to be afraid of people your meeting for the first time

-still have a very sensitive side. One wrong look at you or change in our tone of voice and you just burst into tears with the saddest look at your face. You are a very emotional 2 year old!

-love coloring in coloring books and on the walls too

-have really started voicing your opinion, if you want something it is usually RIGHT NOW and you are sure to let us know

-have a pink polka dot blankie that you have adopted

-LOVE shoes, you put on everyone’s shoes that will let you and you love stomping around in your princess shoes

-love lipstick almost as much as shoes

-are just about the sweetest 2 year old we know and we couldn’t love you more!

I love you to the moon and back sweet girl,

Momma

 

Life is BUSY!

Wow, the last few months have just felt like a whirlwind around here. Life gets so busy sometimes, especially in these seasons with little kiddo’s who still require so much of you, a busy and growing business, marriage, working full time, family and friends, our church, etc. Some updates on me and our family:

-Baby Fazio #3 is making an entrance in October of this year. I cant believe we are already just 3 short months away from having THREE children, aahhh!!! Most exciting part is that its a BOY!

-Olivia and Gianna are enjoying their summer, spending lots of time on our water slide and in grandmas pool, they are just little fishes! School starts again August 1st, Olivia will be in pre-k and Gianna will be in a small home preschool.

-We purchased a new home and are really excited, not about the process of moving in the middle of the summer in Arizona while I am 7 months pregnant, but to have more space, room for my hubby’s business to grow, and most importantly a POOL we just cant wait! Its gonna be a busy couple of months, the move is around the corner, baby will be here before we know it, the holidays, new year, etc. I am looking forward to every wild and crazy minute!

-I am still committed to a wonderful friend and mentor I met at church who takes time out of her schedule each week to mentor me and help me grow in my walk with God. We are going over the attributes of God right now and I am just blown away each week at a new and different view of our Creator. I am so blessed.

-My mom, sister, brother in law and nephew are seriously considering moving to Arizona. This is a BIG deal, I am trying not to get too excited because I know its a huge move for them and a lot is on the line but I am so excited to even think about the possibility of us all being so close.

-My hubby’s business is growing so much and I am just so proud of all the hard work he has put in to make it so successful

-We just celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary. It has most definitely not been all hearts and roses but it has been such a beautiful journey these last 5 years together and I cant wait to see what the next 50 hold!

Life is busy, its crazy and messy at times, but it is so very beautiful. I have really been praying for God to continue to simplify and de-clutter my heart and life, to focus on what really matters, to seek Him first, to love my family deeply, to enjoy the little things, to honor and serve others, and to draw near to HIM in this amazing journey. We are so abundantly blessed most days I still have to pinch myself.

But seek first His Kingdom, and all His righteousness, and all of these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33 NASB